I don't know about you but all the hype and buzz about the Oscars gets right on my nerves. I'm all for credit where credit is due, but they don't half go on about it, that lot over in Los Angeles. Self-congratulatory nonsense and not at all British. Anyway, despite all my reservations, I think an alternative Oscars is a worthwhile distraction, so without further ado I bring you the Carry On Awards!
The "Oh Hello!" Award for Best Entrance...
Charles Hawtrey for his role as Timothy Gorse in Carry On Constable!
The Peter Rogers Award for Economy in Casting...
Peter Butterworth for his role as Pepe and Mario in Carry On Abroad!
The Pinewood Orchard Award for Best Location...
The Old Cock Inn, Carry On Dick!
The Talbot Rothwell Award for best Ad Lib...
Joan Sims for her "My Brother, the Count" reaction in Don't Lose Your Head!
The Dame Barbara Windsor fishing rod Award for Best Special Effect...
The re-generation of Oddbod's finger, Carry On Screaming!
The Angels and Bermans' Award for Best Use of Props...
Jim Dale for not dropping that pesky towel in Carry On Again Doctor!
The Carry On Girls Award for Best Drag Performance...
Bernard Bresslaw!
The Dr Nookey Award for Best Stunt...
Jim Dale on various hospital trolleys at great speed!
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